Help Us Write Our Fan Fiction – Rose City Comic con 2021
Our fan fiction as created with help from the audience at Rose City Comic con 2021:
The alarm clock goes off, blarring like a buzzing siren of a Mushroom Kingdom ambulance that had recently been in a car crash. It’s 8:04 am. MArio is late. Again.
He realizes that today is the day. Today is the day he must finally… have his tazes audited. NMaroes runs out of the daoor, he knew at some point ALL that embezzlement would come back to haunt him. All that embezzlement… from oPrincesss Peach;s daury.
It would be worth it though when he would see Princess Daisy’s eyes when he would give her that gift.
He dreaded the thought of his brother’s eyes when hus birde would have no dowry. Of course, Luigi, being the mob boss he was, was only i the marriage for the money ad would not be happy with this predickaments.
Marios whistyles for Yoshi, who comes trotting up carrying a mysterious bag. Inside the bag was a jar of pickles. An incredibly wondrous jar of pickles. It would come in handy later. ? He ate a pickle… JUST to make ure there was more room int hrwe jar. And thatpcikel… was good. For a pickle.
Inside the pickle, Mario found a piece of paper. And upon the piece of paper, Luigi had left a message, written with pickle juice:
YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID.
Mario eats the pickle to hide the evidence. Om nom. Nom nom nom. Nom nom nomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnomnom.
That’s a big pickle, Mario declared. Mama mia, he sighed, punching Yoshi so that he would go. He was going to the only place where he’d be safe: Bowsettes’.
Mario got into his high-speed cart and drove away (on YOshi). Mario grabbed his pickle and headed off to Walmart instead, for their already low low prices. (Also Bowsette lives at Walmart.)
“Ah ghosts!” said Mario. “Never mind, I saw them first.”
“Oooooooooo,” said the ghosts, cuz they were ghosts. Possibly boo, we can never be sure.
The Boo comes up to Mario and says, “I come for your pickle.” (like in Spongebob.) Mario clutched the pickle jar tightly. How did he know that’s where Mario kept all the cash.???!
Mario got thepickle jar out, grabbed a pickle, and smacked the ghost straight across the face with the pickele. The ghost exclaimed, “Harder. Also, boo.”
Thre ghosts were the ghosts of the tax collector,s the IRS. Not only did they work for the IRS, they were mercenary IRS agents… SENT BY LUGUIDI!
THe door blast popen as the smoke and disy settle. Luigi appears in the doorway, hands upon hips (thusly). Luigi says “You-a disrespect-a me-a.”
“I don’t care who the IRS sends, I’m-a notta paying muh taxes!” You sonsubaguns.
Mario throws a fireball at Bowsette. She’s Bowser again. This is totally how that works. Bowser decrlates : ROAR. THat is all.
Luigi exclaims “How-a-could you.” And pulls out A SECOND PICKLE JARH!
At that moment, Boo launched forward to grab the jar in Mario’s possessions. Luigi’s jar is right out. Just as you think things couldn’t get more intense, Wailuigi brusts in guns blazing.
“WAHSHASJDGSHGDHGS” said? Wailuigi breathingly. Waliugii coughs and says “I have a the asthma and forgetta my Symbicort.” Suddenly, out of nowhere, Peppa Pig burst the door declaring her love for Mario. Peppa Pig’s father was still fat. She’s dressed like Daisy… it was hear the whole time! Scandalous!
If Peppa Pig was Daisy the whole time, where was the real Daisy? In another castle? No one knew where they hid the bodies. OR did they??????????
Mario thinks to himself “Toad’s totally been sus lately. WTH” Luigi tells Mario “I’ve-a hired Toad to-a kid-a-nap your love” Luigi owns the IRS. Luigi owns the Internal Revenue Service. I cannot make this clear. Wait, yes we can.
“I own-a-the IRS!” Luigi clarifies. YOshi swallows the princess and becomes…
Yoshette.
Yoshette draggs Peppa Pigs out of the building.f
Wailugui looks between the brothers and asks “I should say sir, which waaaaaan of you has the real pickle jar,” he declared in a British accent. Lugii holds up his pickel ja,r unspoiled it. He takes a bite of the pickle and out of it comes…
MORE GHOATS! AYEEEEEEEE!
All of the souls Pieepa Pig has scarfified. They’ve been in the pickles all along. What a trite twist.erg
He was training the sol of Lugiis the whole night long. Mario is finally confused. If you have that pickle jar, what pickel ajr to I have? Mario rolls for initiative. 19. Beeter. IUnfortaunately he has a -1 in pickles.
Bowser shouts, “Enough of your pickles, enough of your numbers. I’m the real IRS agent and you’re all under arrest for impesetation a feneral agenty. Wailuigi barely manages to get away as the SWAT team exlucisleyt of Taods enters the building.
Efeveryone dies. But before that…
Daisy walks in. She;s been the President. All along. It’s just like the end of Mario 3, possible the best Mario according to the typer. And the audience. Cuz.
And they smell bacon! Possibly Peppa Pig, but nobody knows… for sure. Wailuigi looks at the rubble and says “ WAAAAAAAAHHHHHYYYYYY?~?!”
Author’s note: This is all true.